Discovering your story

You feel the way you do because of what you are making your current situation mean. Figure out your story and you can let it go. 


This section is the most involved and in-depth of all the sections. In my private sessions it could take up to an hour to make it through this process. Make sure you have at least an hour to dedicate to this section before diving in. Also know that this section is chock full of additional information, which you will see at the bottom of each page. You do not have to read all this information--it is there for your education. Some of the information within the pop-ups contain a lot of information so if you do not want to read through all of that information while going through the process you can select and copy the information to your computer and read it at another time.

Now that you have identified how you feel when you think about or view your body (subject), we are going to figure out why you have that feeling. Since our emotions are always the product of our thoughts, it is going to be helpful to understand what your interpretation of your body (subject) is. This will be the story you have been living within surrounding your body and health (subject) and has been largely responsible for creating and perpetuating your current situation. Once you understand your story is nothing but an interpretation of the facts you will have something that can be changed in order to elicit a better environment for your body to succeed.

Below is a question that asks you why you feel the way you do about your body and health (subject). You want to ask yourself what you are making your current subject mean or say about you that it has you feeling the way you do? Once you know what you are making your current subject mean you will put that answer in the box within the story format below, right after "because (it means)..." Once you have your story complete hit the save button to move on to the next section. 

Asking what you are making your subject mean

Understand that your subject is just what it is. It doesn't take on any meaning until you give it meaning. Your body, the way it looks, moves, feels, etc. is just what it is. The same goes for any other subject you may not like. The fact that you don't like it and feel negative emotion when you think about it simply means you have a preference of something else and you are focused on this subject in a way that is keeping you from your preference. When you give your subject meaning you tend to give life to it, which keeps it active in its current way. When you can see that what you are making where you are mean is nothing more than an interpretation of the facts, then you can choose to find another interpretation at a different emotion, thus leaving this current situation behind.

One thing that might help when you are asking yourself "What am I making this mean?" is to imagine someone else asking you the question. Sometimes we need to have an outsider's help with tough questions like these and imagining someone else asking them puts things in a different context. You can use someone like a parent, a teacher you look(ed) up to or even someone you admire. I often imagine my personal therapist asking me these questions.

Note: Don't be surprised if you continue to come up with answers that seem like more facts--things that seem to be true rather than interpretations. Continue through this process until you have something you can say is an interpretation.

What's your belief about your subject?

Another way of understanding what you are making your subject mean is to look for your belief about your subject. Instead of asking what you are making your body (or any subject) mean or say about you that it has you feeling the way you do, you could ask yourself what your belief is about your subject. For example, if you are feeling disappointed about your belly fat, what is your belief about the belly fat? Does is make you look ugly or unattractive? Does it make you look lazy? Understand that beliefs are just practiced thoughts (usually based on a limited view of reality--that is, when there is negative emotion involved) and those beliefs, if unattended, can become truths for you. Those truths then become the program in which you create from relative to this subject.

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I AM statements

It's easy for people to get locked into identifying their "problem" with their identity. We do this when we say something that begins with "I am." Like "I am overweight or fat." To say "I am" is attaching whatever comes after it to your identity and it is very difficult to remove something that is woven into your identity. No one likes to lose their identity, even if it is a bad one. It's like losing a sense of your self. Most of us don't even realize we are doing this--that we have attached something we are experiencing to our identity.

So pay close attention for "I am" statements as you go through your stories. Know thatyou are not fat, your body is. You are not in pain, your back is in pain. When you shift this statement you will notice that it puts your "problem" in a different perspective. It is much easier changing something about your body than it is changing your identity. When you consciously remove the problem from your identity by changing "I am" to something like "my body is" you quickly remove it from your identity, which means you don't have to change your identity anymore.

bottom curve